We Are Never Meeting in Real Life

Can you believe we are already in 2020? Crazy, right? What are some new year intentions you created for yourself? Did you finally do all the things you said you were going to do? Me either.
This year has been a slow transition. I’m slowly learning to trust into the universe more. Even though, I hate that shit. Sometimes it’s not the universe but truly ourselves that need to take the leap. But whatever.
I’ve been reading more this year. I started reading poems to fix my stupid broken heart. Surprisingly though, that shit just made me feel even worse. Memory lane is a fucking bitch. So I turned to Noname’s book club and what she has on the list. That’s when I found, We are never meeting in real life by Samatha Irby. This bitch is everything. (I mean bitch in a good way.) She’s bold, hilarious and at moments felt like I was reading about my own journal.
what I loved about this book right off the jump was her writing style. It felt like you were catching up with an old friend. An old friend who had everything to say and wasn’t afraid to say it. She’s raw.

The fabulous Samantha Irby // @bitchesgottaeat

I don’t want to go too detailed about the book because I don’t want to ruin it, so instead I will share my favorite quotes from the book that had me rolling and/or I related too so fuckin hard.

I’m in love and it’s boring: “How do I know I’m in love if I don’t want to kill myself all the time?”
I’m in love and it’s boring: “The gut wrenching pain of causal rejection was my oxygen.”
“Foolish to expect that what you’ll want two, five or ten years from now will be exactly the same thing that fills you up today.”
Feelings are a mistake: “I cried all the way to the 24 hr grocery store and ate half of a rotisserie chicken in the parking lot. It was the tribute she would have wanted.”
Feelings are a mistake: “I just tried to haphazardly arrange other peop le’s projections and shit I thought was cool into something captivating.”

You DONT have to be grateful for sex: “I feel like my sexiness is a thing that creeps up on you, like mold on a loaf of corner store bread you thought you’d get there more days out of.”

Another book by @bitchesgottaeat

You don’t have to be grateful for sex: ““you wanna touch it?” He offered hopefully. “oh, no, thank you!” I replied with a forced cheerfulness like I was at a friends house turning down his mom’s offer of a second helping of peas.”

The whole section, A semi detailed manifest of a few smoking hot dudes I’ve banged who thought I should have thanked them for the pleasure.

Fuck it bitch, stay fat: “You need bitches to write about how comfortable maternity jeans are for women who aren’t really pregnant. And sexy ways to remove a bra with four hooks.”
Fuck it bitch, stay fat: “I’m a negative person by nature and I typically shy away from anything that requires me to be having visible fun.”

Happy Birthday: This whole chapter means a lot to me, also having to watch a parent slowly die/ when they get sick is some real heavy shit. This was very relatable and at times I was still able to laugh at certain situations. Samantha has such a way to her writing, even for the sad shit.

All in all, this book is absolutely everything and just such a great read, so if you’re black, queer, gay, fat, femme, however you identify this is the book for you!

Another collection of essays by @bitchesgottaeat

A Black Lady Sketch Show

A Black Lady Sketch Show couldn’t have come any sooner. From creator, Robin Thede who has gathered a tremendous cast of a talented Black Women. Cast includes Quinta Brunson, Ashley Nicole Black and Gabrielle Dennis. The show is backed my Issa Rae Productions and is also involved in the skits! The celebrity guest on this show is insane. All the classics, new and old including Angela Bassett, Laverne Cox, Phil Lamar (Mad TV), Nicole Byer (Nailed It), Khandi Alexandar (Scandal), MARLA GIBBS and Jackèe Harry just to name a few because the list is too damn long. But impressive as fuck!

@robinthede

It’s so refreshing to see an all Black cast thrive and deliver so well. I feel like it’s been a minute since we had many mainly Black cast T.V. shows since the 90s but it’s like there’s been a robot and I’m fucking here for it. REPRESENTATION MATTERS!
I also I want to point out that these shows don’t feel corny or slave based. Their smart, their intelligent, and most importantly they are saying something. MESSAGE! They are unapologetic and uncomfortable. Shows like Insecure, Atlanta, Watchmen, Randon Acts of Flyness, American Gods etc. It just shows when we are given the chance and opportunity, our creations can grow so big and can create a ball of action. It’s such a beautiful thing.

@quintab

First off, I really want to acknowledge the introduction to A Black Lady Sketch Show because I fucking love puppetry and I’m so glad they went in that direction. Puppetry will never die!! And there’s actually a lot of POC who work in that industry and I feel like it’s slowly making a comeback too! Plus their theme song is Hot Girl by the beautiful Megan Thee Stallion. She’s a fucking angel and I love her.

@ablackladysketchshow

My favorite skits so far of season 1:

Get the Belt: This skit has my side hurting, I was laughing so hard. Just the memories of my mother making me get up from my room just to hand her a remote feet away from her. Ohh, and don’t let you get caught talking back! This was a throw back forsure.

Black Lady Courtroom: Have you ever felt the joy of being able to share a public space with other Black people and for the first time can fucking relax and just be you? That’s a 👏🏾 Black 👏🏾 Lady👏🏾 Courtroom.

Rome and Julissa: Hands down my favorite. I’m a big fan of the 1996 version of Romeo and Juliet soo I was already in love. But this skit was so funny and smart and who ever thought of doing this is a fucking genius. One of the realest beef of last decade was Cardi B Vs. Nicki Minaj. Full disclosure: I like both and don’t believe in the idea of putting women especially woc against each other. Both bitches are talented as fuck.

I am soo excited for these talented woman and can’t wait for season 2 of A Black Lady Sketch Show. Season 1 is available on HBO and clips of each skit can be found on YouTube.
GO SUPPORT BLACK WOMEN!!!

Queen & Slim

Queen & Slim, directed by Melina Matsoukas (known for Insecure, Beyoncé’s Formation and Master of None) and screenplay written by the amazingly talented Lena Waithe. This story follows Queen (Jodie Turner-Smith) and Slim (Daniel Kaluuya) and the love that develops between them through the roughest circumstances.

@queenandslim

**SPOILERS**
Has a Tinder date ever ended in a six day race for your life? Probably not. But for Queen & Slim this becomes their life. All from a “simple” pull over from police. How does this happen from supposedly missing a turn signal? Well, let’s keep it real. Most police are racist as fuck. Black people have to shift personalities when it comes to police and any type of authority for that matter. A simple remark such as, “Can you hurry up, it’s cold” could have you killed. We are constantly put in situations where our lives can be in danger.

@queenandslim

For Queen & Slim it was shoot or be killed. Within these six days, they are on the run for their lives. Two people who know nothing about each other soon find out, they are all they have left. Queen, an intelligent yet cold attorney and Slim, a God fearing full hearted family man learn not just about each other but themselves. Their vulnerability wraps around them fiercely. Trauma will soon keep them. A love begins to form, and not just any love, Black Love.

@queenandslim

Not only was the cast amazing, including Bokeem Woodbine aka Uncle Earl (Snowfall, Underground & Wu-Tang American Saga) Indya Moore aka Goddess (POSE) and Anahi Di’allo Winston aka Junior (Everything Sucks, Proud Mary & The Dead Don’t Die) but the cinematography was breathtaking. The scenery shots of New Orleans, capturing Black beauty at old town bars, the stills of all the actors. Matsoukas did an extraordinary job with the visuals. It all comes together beautifully, even down to the last scene. Even if that scene was of the loss. We will never forget them.

@queenandslim

I’m going to go ahead a say it, this is the best movie I’ve seen this year. Maybe my whole life. I mean, it’s definitely not a movie I could watch over and over. But it’s the type of movie that will stay with me forever. I’m pretty sure that’s the goal. To make you think, to feel emotion. As a Black women the premise of this movie was already close to home but I needed to see this film. EVERYONE NEEDS TO SEE THIS FILM.

Andre D. Wagner

I saw it thanksgiving night with my family. That night, driving home at 2 in the morning, I started to get paranoid. Checking my mirror, making sure I was driving the speed limit. I couldn’t stop thinking about this movie and the consequences Black people have to constantly face. They said the actors had watched the Sandra Bland (RIP) video to prepare. I didn’t sleep that night. How could I? I was filled with frustration and anger. A part of me wanted to believe they would survive. But the sad truth was that I knew better. Black people don’t get to survive. Not in these movies. I’m learning that even though I want to live, I want US to live, some have to be immortal in order to tell our stories. This is to Queen & Slim. Fictional characters who I see my relflection in, characters that represent all the names we know and don’t know. ✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾

Dollface

Doll face is a hilarious new series on Hulu that reflects on what happens when you abandon your girlfriends when you’re in a relationship. And what happens when said relationship ends and you find your’re all alone.

@dollfaceonhulu

Jules (Kat Dennings) just got dumped after being in a relationship for the past five years. After realizing her whole life was wrapped around her ex she slowly begins her journey to reconnect with her long lost bffs, Madison (Brenda Song) and Stella (Shay Mitchell).

@dollfaceonhulu

This is no easy task, for her friends are not convinced she’s taking their friendship seriously and Jules will have to prove that she’s still best friend material. For Jules she has to learn what it means to balance out relationships or forever become a cat lady.

What I love about this show, is the genuine idea that having a relationship with women is important. With social media, it feels like women are always competing in life when in reality, a lot of women have strong bonds together. We are constantly uplifting each other and it’s important to have strong women in our corner willing to fight for us and with us!

This Way Up

This Way Up is a hilarious series on Hulu starring and written by the magnificent Aisling Bea. Directed by Alex Winckler. This series is set in London, Aine (Bea) has just gotten out of rehab due to a nervous breakdown. Her sister Shona (Sharon Horgan) and also best friend is doing her best to help with the transition into the real world again. This series is perfect in every way, showing the realities of anxiety, trying to figure your family and all the complexities of life while just trying to fucking get through a single day.

Aisling Bea, Sorcha Cusack and Sharon Horgan //@weemissbea

Aine is quirky and funny but awkward as hell. Throughout all her jokes and quirks she slowly starts to break out of her shell. She gets a new job teaching English to 12 year old Etienne (Dorian Grover) who is originally from France. She starts to go out more with her roommate Bradley (Kadiff Kirwan, Chewing Gum). She even realizes she doesn’t have to give a fuck what people think about her, including her ex Freddie (Chris Geere, You’re the Worst).

Kadiff Kirwan and Danielle Vitalis // @weemissbea

The relatable character of Aine reminds you to take it one day at a fucking time. That’s it’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay not be sure of yourself. But one thing that shouldn’t be okay, is giving up on yourself. To know that mental health takes all the time it needs. So, do yourself a favor and go watch, This Way Up! Go laugh! Shit, go cry! It’s worth it!

Summer Walker: Over It!

Summer Walker’s album, Over It was reaching number one on charts before it was even released. We patiently waited, and it has arrived and people are fuckin’ with it hard. Summer Walker was getting attention after Drake remixed her song Girls Need Love. After working alongside partner in crime and producer London On Da Track (aka London Holmes) she came out with such a refreshing R&B sound. Not holding standards about how female R&B singers should look or sound. Being completely raw and honest about her wants and needs. Her personality shows true throughout the album. My favorite tracks include:

Come thru ft. Usher I fucking love this song. A lot of artist have been remixing 90s music and some can be so hit and miss. Summer really does this song well and creates it her own. I love the nostalgia feel to the track. Lol, I almost forgot about Usher (don’t) but it was good to hear his voice again and see that he still has it!

Playing Games ft. Bryson Tiller Another song reminisced of the 90s R&B sound. “Say my name, say my name.” This song will soon be a classic. Summer’s soft vocals sing a song of the classic situationship, will something change? Or should you just let it go?

Fun Girl My favorite track on the album. A somber acoustic tale about the obscurities of being a woman and the double standard. How men are easily threaten by a woman that doesn’t need to depend on them emotionally or sexually. “Take me out of the categories of marriage/ is it cause I know what I want just like you?”
“Because I love who I want/ and fuck who I choose.”

@summerwalker

Summer Walker is just in the beginning era of her career and I’m excited to see how her sound evolves. Don’t forget to stream the album. Available on all platforms. Also, FIRST AND LAST TOUR! TICKETS ON SALE NOW.

@summerwalker

BROCKHAMPTON: GINGER

BROCKHAMPTON is basically the new age boy band you didn’t even know you needed. The group consist of Kevin Abstract, Matt Champion, Merlyn Wood, Dom McLennon, Bearface and JOBA. All talented with different backgrounds from being musicians, rappers, producers, graphic designers, and videographers all coming together and creating something fucking REAL. Known for their 2016 album, All- American Trash and 2017 Saturation. BROCKHAMPTON has dropped their 5th album, GINGER. What I love about this group is how each person is so different, their own sound and style but can come together and create such an amazing blur of genres. They are a true inspiration for further “boy bands” that you can do something unique without being like everyone else.

@jobaisreal

Big Boy: This is my favorite track of the album. It has this somber feeling, extremely honest and raw about the realities of growing up a boy and having to suppress your every emotion. “Don’t pout ‘round me/ don’t cry around me/ don’t laugh ‘round me.” Sometimes it can be hard to undo patterns you learn as a child, but then you get to grow up and make your own decisions. “I’m weak and I’ll say it proud. Built me up, pull me down/ let’s air it out/ patch me up and stitch it/ make me better.” - JOBA

@brckhmptn

Dearly Departed: This track feels like the group is able to finally get everything off their chest about loss, trauma and betrayal. This was their opportunity to speak out about their ex band mate that choose himself over the band. “Pass the weight off to your friends and never faced the truth, because you never learned how to be a man.” - JOBA and Matt Champion’s “I done shit on myself too much to not know how to move properly now.”

I Been Born Again:  I love the whisper intro to this song; I don’t know why but that with the beat in the background just flow so well together. I also really appreciate the instrumentals they sneak in with the mixing, like in this track JOBA is playing the piano. Some other tracks their guitars in them. It's just refreshing when artist can actually play instruments as well. 

Two favorite lines in the song includes, “It ain't no one business who or what we doin’ (That's right) /Hit this gas, they break the glass and keep it movin’ /To you basic bitches I know I'm a nuisance”- Dom McLennon 
 “Write my own shit/ hit my own switch/ watch the clock tick/ never ran and hid/tell it like it is”- JOBA 

WILLOW

Willow Smith has dropped her third album. Willow, self titled is full of ethereal sounds, Willow’s beautiful spacey vocals send you to different realms of reality. What I love about Willow and her music is how humble she is. How every project she comes out with, is an extension of her love and her beliefs.

Source @willowsmith

Female Energy Pt. 2

“Oh, and I’m falling into the arms of naked truth/ not surprised to see the sky and only think of you.” Willow comes in strumming a guitar and her silky echoey voice fills into your ears, reminding you not to lose focus of oneself in another. We are reminded of our own energy. Our sacrifice.

Time Machine

Do you ever feel like you should have been born a different time? That there are moments in history that resonate with you more? This is the feeling you get when you listen to Time Machine. Willow let’s her loved one know, if she could, she would go back to a simpler time.

“Everyone is disconnected these days/ cause everyone is looking at their phone/ tryna feel like they are less alone.”

Photography by @poplife5000

PrettyGirlz

“I want a girl who knows herself/ like her favorite book right on the shelf/ that she’s read a million times/ passions there, she can’t decline.”

Willow addresses the societal pressures that women or “pretty girls” must go through in life. We are condition to look a certain way, to act a certain way. It’s all bullshit. Just a friendly reminder to be whoever the fuck you want to be.

SAMO is Now

“You love me? Not especially. I’m alone. We all are, here.”

Drums, deep low tones, Willow’s vocals are a blanket, but of what? Is this attraction? Is this obsession? What do we actually want vs. how people make us feel. That’s how I would describe this song. You’re drifting away in uncertainty.

WILLOW is streaming on all platforms.